HOME |  CULT MOVIES | COMPETITIONS | ADVERTISE |  CONTACT US |  ABOUT US
 
 
 
Newest Reviews
Antebellum
Offering, The
Enola Holmes
Big Calamity, The
Man Under Table
Freedom Fields
Settlers
Boy Behind the Door, The
Swords of the Space Ark
I Still See You
Most Beautiful Boy in the World, The
Luz: The Flower of Evil
Human Voice, The
Guns Akimbo
Being a Human Person
Giants and Toys
Millionaires Express
Bringing Up Baby
World to Come, The
Air Conditioner
Fear and Loathing in Aspen
Kandisha
Riders of Justice
Happiest Day in the Life of Olli Maki, The
For Those Who Think Young
Justice League: War
Fuzzy Pink Nightgown, The
Plurality
Scooby-Doo! Moon Monster Madness
Night of the Sharks
Werewolves Within
Honeymoon
King and Four Queens, The
Stray Dolls
Diana's Wedding
Deerskin
Toll, The
Two of Us
Nowhere Special
Rainbow Jacket, The
   
 
Newest Articles
A Monument to All the Bullshit in the World: 1970s Disaster Movies
Take Care with Peanuts: Interview with Melissa Menta (SVP of Marketing)
Silent is Golden: Futtocks End... and Other Short Stories on Blu-ray
Winner on Losers: West 11 on Blu-ray
Freewheelin' - Bob Dylan: Odds and Ends on Digital
Never Sleep: The Night of the Hunter on Blu-ray
Sherlock vs Ripper: Murder by Decree on Blu-ray
That Ol' Black Magic: Encounter of the Spooky Kind on Blu-ray
She's Evil! She's Brilliant! Basic Instinct on Blu-ray
Hong Kong Dreamin': World of Wong Kar Wai on Blu-ray
Buckle Your Swash: The Devil-Ship Pirates on Blu-ray
Way of the Exploding Fist: One Armed Boxer on Blu-ray
A Lot of Growing Up to Do: Fast Times at Ridgemont High on Blu-ray
Oh My Godard: Masculin Feminin on Blu-ray
Let Us Play: Play for Today Volume 2 on Blu-ray
Before The Matrix, There was Johnny Mnemonic: on Digital
More Than Mad Science: Karloff at Columbia on Blu-ray
Indian Summer: The Darjeeling Limited on Blu-ray
3 from 1950s Hollyweird: Dr. T, Mankind and Plan 9
Meiko Kaji's Girl Gangs: Stray Cat Rock on Arrow
Having a Wild Weekend: Catch Us If You Can on Blu-ray
The Drifters: Star Lucie Bourdeu Interview
Meiko Kaji Behind Bars: Female Prisoner Scorpion on Arrow
The Horror of the Soviets: Viy on Blu-ray
Network Double Bills: Tarka the Otter and The Belstone Fox
   
 
  Parker Yus, M'Lady
Year: 2013
Director: Taylor Hackford
Stars: Jason Statham, Jennifer Lopez, Michael Chiklis, Wendell Pierce, Clifton Collins Jr, Bobby Cannavale, Patti LuPone, Carlos Carasco, Micah A. Hauptman, Emma Booth, Nick Nolte, Daniel Bernhardt, Billy Slaughter, Kirk Baltz, James Carraway
Genre: Drama, Action, ThrillerBuy from Amazon
Rating:  5 (from 1 vote)
Review: It had all been planned to perfection: the location was the Ohio State Fair, where the takings for the day were being kept in an office, guarded by security. The gang were in disguise, and Parker (Jason Statham), dressed as a preacher, was at the office first, though not before helping a little girl win a cuddly toy at a sideshow, but on seeing the green balloons belonging to another gang member go up, he knew it was time to get going. They overpowered the guards easily, with Parker assisting one of them who was suffering a panic attack, but not all had gone to plan...

What with him helping moppets and talking a nervous guard through his tizzy, you may be wondering why Parker is pursuing a career in crime and not social work, but that was all to establish him as a thoroughly decent gent even if he did make his money illegally. Was this the Parker of the Richard Stark novels? At least he was called by that name in this adaptation, as in the others - such as the classic Point Blank, and the not-so-classic Payback, for example - they gave him a different one, but as the dedication to Donald E. Westlake indicated (Stark was his pseudonym) everyone here thought they were doing justice to a classic character.

Which they weren't, really, because instead of coming across as a plot leaping off the pages of a high octane thrill ride, this was very ordinary stuff, with only occasional bursts of life in a production which suggested a television pilot more than a work suitable for the big screen. Statham was his usual gruff self, except when called on to adopt a Texan accent as part of a disguise whereupon he became weirdly reminiscent of Woody Harrelson, but he tackled the hand to hand combat sequences with believability, which was more than could be said for his character's choices as he made his way through the double cross and revenge plot template.

Yes, poor old Parker really needed to pick his friends better, because as they are making their getaway the question of collecting even more cash arises, and he is none too keen. Which is unfortunate, because the others are very eager to do so, to the extent that they are willing to murder Parker to get their way. So the sole dissenting voice is left for dead by the side of the road with a gunshot wound, only to be found soon after by a family of Good Samaritans who take him to hospital, which he escapes from before anyone can ask any questions, then draws up his scheme to get what's owed to him and see to it that the naughty men never do what they did again. That this involves Jennifer Lopez is an important point.

Well, it was an important point to her, because she played Leslie Rodgers, an estate agent seeking her big commission but stuck living with her mother (Patti LuPone) with next to no prospects and no romance, in spite of looking like J-Lo. Oddly, when Parker enters her life as part of that scheme, he's not there as love interest thanks to already being married to Claire (Emma Booth), so the best Leslie can hope for is financial benefits, though that doesn't stop the scene where she has to strip down to her underwear to prove she's not wearing a wire happening, which also proves yeah, I'm a fortysomething mother of two who could pass for a twentysomething! Suck it! Or whatever Miss Lopez would say in those circumstances. Anyway, while noting that Nick Nolte (in a nothing role) at this stage in his life made Lionel Stander sound like Keira Knightley, you still had two hours of ho-hum, nothing much to see here antics that ended up as you would expect, not bad punch-ups aside. Music by David Buckley.
Reviewer: Graeme Clark

 

This review has been viewed 1840 time(s).

As a member you could Rate this film

 
Review Comments (0)


Untitled 1

Login
  Username:
 
  Password:
 
   
 
Forgotten your details? Enter email address in Username box and click Reminder. Your details will be emailed to you.
   

Latest Poll
Which star probably has psychic powers?
Laurence Fishburne
Nicolas Cage
Anya Taylor-Joy
Patrick Stewart
Sissy Spacek
Michelle Yeoh
Aubrey Plaza
Tom Cruise
Beatrice Dalle
Michael Ironside
   
 
   

Recent Visitors
Graeme Clark
Andrew Pragasam
Darren Jones
Enoch Sneed
  Desbris M
  Paul Tuersley
  Chris Garbutt
  Sdfadf Rtfgsdf
   

 

Last Updated: