HOME |  CULT MOVIES | COMPETITIONS | ADVERTISE |  CONTACT US |  ABOUT US
 
 
 
Newest Reviews
Night Raiders
Samourai, Le
Advent Calendar, The
Champion
Merchant of Four Seasons, The
Love of Jeanne Ney, The
Blonde. Purple
Dirty Ho
Annette
Shepherd
Dying to Divorce
Bad Luck Banging or Loony Porn
Trouble with Being Born, The
Last Matinee, The
Strings, The
Free Hand for a Tough Cop
People Just Do Nothing: Big in Japan
Dear Future Children
Accidental Luxuriance of the Translucent Watery Rebus
Swallow
Thin Red Line, The
Petite Maman
Fast & Furious 9
Sundown: The Vampire in Retreat
Sweet Thing
Maelstrom
Father, The
Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings
Night House, The
Father of Flies
80,000 Years Old
Dead & Beautiful
Bull
Censor
Sleep
Freaky
Nightbooks
Whisker Away, A
Wild Indian
Whale Island
   
 
Newest Articles
Keeping the Beatles Alive: Get Back
The Punk Rock Movie: Out of the Blue on Blu-ray
Yeah, Too Quiet: The Great Silence on Blu-ray
Vestron Double Bill: Dementia 13 and The Wraith
Farewell Dean Stockwell: His Years of Weirdness
Kung Fu Craft: Cinematic Vengeance! on Blu-ray
999 Letsbe Avenue: Gideon's Way on Blu-ray
Hungary for Cartoons: Hungarian Animations on MUBI
You Have No Choice: Invasion of the Body Snatchers on Blu-ray
You Can't Tame What's Meant to Be Wild: The Howling on Blu-ray
Commendably Brief: Short Sharp Shocks Vol. 2 on Blu-ray
Super Silents: Early Universal Vol. 2 on Blu-ray
Fable Fear: The Singing Ringing Tree on Blu-ray
Gunsight Eyes: The Sabata Trilogy on Blu-ray
Bloody Bastard Baby: The Monster/I Don't Want to Be Born on Blu-ray
Night of the Animated Dead: Director Jason Axinn Interview
The ParaPod: A Very British Ghost Hunt - Interview with Director/Star Ian Boldsworth
On the Right Track: Best of British Transport Films Vol. 2
The Guns of Nutty Joan: Johnny Guitar on Blu-ray
Intercourse Between Two Worlds: Twin Peaks Fire Walk with Me/The Missing Pieces on Blu-ray
Enjoy the Silents: Early Universal Vol. 1 on Blu-ray
Masterful: The Servant on Blu-ray
70s Sitcom Dads: Bless This House and Father Dear Father on Blu-ray
Going Under: Deep Cover on Blu-ray
Child's Play: Children's Film Foundation Bumper Box Vol. 3 on DVD
   
 
  10,000 B.C. A Mammoth Undertaking
Year: 2008
Director: Roland Emmerich
Stars: Stephen Strait, Camilla Belle, Cliff Curtis, Joe Virgel, Affif Ben Badra, Mo Zinal, Nathanael Baring, Mona Hammond, Marco Khan, Reece Ritchie, Joel Fry, Omar Sharif, Kristian Beazley, Junior Olyphant, Louise Tu'u, Jacob Renton, Grayson Hunt Urwin
Genre: Historical, AdventureBuy from Amazon
Rating:  4 (from 1 vote)
Review: Way back in prehistory, a tribe of Europeans were growing worried about their source of food, the mammoth herds which periodically moved through their valley and provided these hunters with a way of life. Their wise woman went into one of her trances during a ceremony and foretold of one child born to them with blue eyes would lead the tribe out of their situation, and so it was that Evolet (Camilla Belle) grew up to be one of their most lauded members, and the object of affection for D'Leh (Stephen Strait). His father had abandoned them years before to journey south, and soon D'Leh would make a journey of his own...

On the face of it, writer and director Roland Emmerich's 10,000 B.C. was a move towards greater historical accuracy than its soundalike predecessors One Million B.C. and One Million Years B.C. had been, so there were no dinosaurs in this one. But for the historians, calling it that was asking for trouble, as there were a host of historical innacuracies if this was truly meant to be taking place around the time of the title, so perhaps they would have been better if they had opted to call it something vaguer. Time of the Mammoth, Messing up the Pyramids, Long Ago Stuff, that sort of thing. As it was, most viewers wouldn't be too bothered by getting dates wrong.

What they were more bothered about was the manner in which this whole silly adventure took itself deadly seriously: not one joke in the entire running time, and precious little fun to be had otherwise, truth be told. There were a bunch of CGI creatures that interrupted the action every so often, and while there had evidently been a lot of work put into them they still looked like something out of a computer game rather than living and breathing animals, but seeing mammoth, giant birds and a sabre tooth tiger which gets to anticipate the story of Androcles and the Lion did go some way to livening up the piece.

It's just that if this confirmed anything, it's that early mankind needed a bit more oomph in the personality stakes if they were to be an engaging group of characters. They didn't need to be dropping pop culture references or breaking out into comedy rap numbers, but as depicted here they were a seriously dull lot - not the fault of the actors, who did their best, but the fault of an uninspired script. What happens to set the adventure ball rolling, after a quick mammoth hunt in the first ten minutes, is that a band of outlaws pass through the valley and proceed to kidnap the youngest and strongest members of the tribe, though to what end we do not know yet. Well, not all of them.

No, for there are three - make that four - tribesmen who managed to lie low and escape the kidnappings, so set out after them by following the trail Kenny Everett, sorry, Evolet leaves for them by dropping parts of her bone necklace along the way. It's basic save the damsel in distress stuff, which means D'Leh could be a knight of old in shining armour or a prince of the Arabian Nights, we're getting a well worn plot here. However, Emmerich and co-writer Harald Kloser have a message of emancipation in mind, not female emancipation, but that of the right to be free, that is, not bound in slavery, so it turns out the baddies are using their captives to build a few landmarks that might look familiar. Considering what happens at the end, the setback D'Leh instigates didn't set them back that far. Nobody makes much of an impression, not even Belle with her blue contact lenses, but watch out for Marco Khan doing his best Sid Haig impersonation; a few more performances like that and this might have been less disappointing. Music by Kloser and Thomas Wa- uh, Thomas Wander.
Reviewer: Graeme Clark

 

This review has been viewed 6694 time(s).

As a member you could Rate this film

 
Review Comments (1)


Untitled 1

Login
  Username:
 
  Password:
 
   
 
Forgotten your details? Enter email address in Username box and click Reminder. Your details will be emailed to you.
   

Latest Poll
Which star probably has psychic powers?
Laurence Fishburne
Nicolas Cage
Anya Taylor-Joy
Patrick Stewart
Sissy Spacek
Michelle Yeoh
Aubrey Plaza
Tom Cruise
Beatrice Dalle
Michael Ironside
   
 
   

Recent Visitors
Graeme Clark
Darren Jones
Andrew Pragasam
Jason Cook
Enoch Sneed
  Desbris M
  Paul Tuersley
  Chris Garbutt
   

 

Last Updated: