HOME |  CULT MOVIES | COMPETITIONS | ADVERTISE |  CONTACT US |  ABOUT US
 
 
 
Newest Reviews
Killer Therapy
Man Upstairs, The
Bloodhound, The
New Mutants, The
Tesla
Flame of New Orleans, The
Ham on Rye
Imperial Blue
Tenet
August 32nd on Earth
Don is Dead, The
Seven Sinners
Body of Water
Away
Soul
About Endlessness
Let It Snow
Ava
Deliver Us from Evil
Shark Attack 3: Megalodon
Midnight Sky, The
Lego Star Wars Holiday Special, The
Mon Oncle Antoine
Blast of Silence
Blackout, The
Stars in Your Eyes
Alone
Climate of the Hunter
Farewell Amor
Let's Scare Julie
Okko's Inn
Shaolin vs. Wu Tang
Fatman
Butt Boy
Dog of Flanders, The
Bushido Blade, The
Jiu Jitsu
Blind
Space Sheriff Gavan: The Movie
Fireworks, Should We See It from the Side or the Bottom?
   
 
Newest Articles
Chaney Chillers: Inner Sanctum Mysteries - The Complete Film Series on Blu-ray
Adelphi Extras: Stars in Your Eyes on Blu-ray
Toons for the Heads: Fantastic Planet and Adult Animation
Nature Girl: The New World on Blu-ray
Network Double Bills: Perfect Friday and Robbery
Network Double Bills: The House in Nightmare Park and The Man Who Haunted Himself
Newley Minted: The Strange World of Gurney Slade on Blu-ray
Bad Love: The Night Porter on Blu-ray
Brevity is the Soul of Weird: Short Sharp Shocks on Blu-ray
Get Your Ass to Mars: Total Recall on Blu-ray
Call the Professionals: Le Cercle Rouge on Blu-ray
When There's No More Room in Hell: Dawn of the Dead on Blu-ray
The Butterfly Effect: Mothra on Blu-ray
Living Room Theatre: Play for Today Volume 1 on Blu-ray
Didn't He Do Well: The Bruce Forsyth Show on DVD
Blood Wedding: The Bride with White Hair on Blu-ray
The Inhuman Element: The Ladykillers on 4K UHD
As You Like It, Baby: Breathless on Blu-ray
Stargazing: Light Entertainment Rarities on DVD
Down to the Welles: Orson Welles Great Mysteries Volume 2 on DVD
Herding Cats: Sleepwalkers on Blu-ray
Confessions of a Porn Star: Adult Material on DVD
They're Still Not Sure It is a Baby: Eraserhead on Blu-ray
Werewolves are Real: Dog Soldiers on Digital
Rose: A Love Story - Producers April Kelley and Sara Huxley Interview
   
 
  Frankenstein's Great Aunt Tillie Relatively Creaking
Year: 1984
Director: Myron J. Gold
Stars: Donald Pleasence, Yvonne Furneaux, June Wilkinson, Miguel Ángel Fuentes, Aldo Ray, Rod Colbin, Chandler Garrison, Phil Leeds, Garnett Smith, Ken Smith, Karen Harber, Edgar Vivar, Joaquín García Vargas, Joy George, Margaret Donaghey, Zsa Zsa Gabor
Genre: Horror, Comedy, TrashBuy from Amazon
Rating:  2 (from 1 vote)
Review: The European village of Mucklefugger has been quiet in the hundred years since Baron Frankenstein visited his terror upon them and the world, creating a monster who rampaged through the place until it was finally overwhelmed and destroyed. But now the Baron's descendant (Donald Pleasence) has arrived with his Great Aunt Tillie (Yvonne Furneaux) and his wife Randy (June Wilkinson), the aunt being over a hundred years old herself and able to recall the events that drove her family from the castle. She has preserved herself with extract from bees, as the Frankensteins are nothing if not innovative when it comes to science, though what she would really like to do is win a motor race...

Apparently, among those who have seen this thing, it was originally a British-made, Mexican set, American funded television series, but for some reason lost to the mists of time, possibly because the producers could find nobody who wanted to buy it, never mind watch it, the whole shebang was re-edited as a feature film, cutting out whole swathes of plot that were chopped up and added to the end of the movie just before the credits. If that sounds shoddy, you don't know the half of it, as this must be one of the least finished films ever made, with just about everyone who gives it a go bailing out by at the half hour mark, if not well before, thanks to its crushing effect of boredom.

It was supposed to be a comedy, but there was nothing remotely funny about it, unless funny peculiar counts, though there are occasional, actual jokes that crop up which are as corny as they are laboured. Pleasence appeared to be enjoying himself, cavorting in an ill-fitting wig with ex-Playboy Playmate Wilkinson, though both were past their prime, and Furneaux was another star who had made her name in the nineteen-sixties, making a one-off return to the screen after retiring over a decade before. The writer and director, Myron J. Gold, was another making a return after a lengthy hiatus from any onscreen credits, though you would have recommended him not to bother.

Pitiful was the best word to describe the utter shambles that unfolded here, the effect of linking a bunch of plots together from various episodes, as you might expect, no coherence whatsoever. Just when you were getting used to the idea of one storyline, or anyway making some semblance of sense out of it, it would be jettisoned and if you were lucky, referred to later on. A bit where women's suffrage is suddenly very important, with demonstrations and stunts, was abruptly dropped, for example, though you may well be pondering what that had to do with a Frankenstein movie. Indeed, the expected creation of life from dead body parts took place in flashback to the original Baron (Pleasence sans hairpiece), yet somehow all the other characters from the present day were there too.

Zsa Zsa Gabor was the guest star, so her fans might be tempted to check this out thanks to her, but not only did she not have any lines, she wasn't in this any longer than a minute in a sequence that didn't amount to anything very much. But then, nothing in this did, it rambled and wavered and dawdled and more importantly, drove you up the wall if you wanted anything resembling a professional piece of work. Should you reach the very end of those credits, you would hear a voice saying "Oh, shit", the only swearing in the whole effort, and if they had put that at the start you could count it as fair warning. There was a monster in it, a very tall Mexican bloke painted blue (or maybe grey) but without the Boris Karloff flat head, and he was revived, and there was a halfhearted allusion to Young Frankenstein, but again, none of it even slightly humorous. It was almost worth seeing this to get to the end after all, not because it was any good, but because that would be a kind of achievement in itself. Music by Ronald Stein.
Reviewer: Graeme Clark

 

This review has been viewed 1099 time(s).

As a member you could Rate this film

 
Review Comments (0)


Untitled 1

Login
  Username:
 
  Password:
 
   
 
Forgotten your details? Enter email address in Username box and click Reminder. Your details will be emailed to you.
   

Latest Poll
Which star probably has psychic powers?
Laurence Fishburne
Nicolas Cage
Anya Taylor-Joy
Patrick Stewart
Sissy Spacek
Michelle Yeoh
Aubrey Plaza
Tom Cruise
Beatrice Dalle
Michael Ironside
   
 
   

Recent Visitors
Graeme Clark
Darren Jones
Andrew Pragasam
Stately Wayne Manor
Enoch Sneed
  Geraint Morgan
Paul Smith
  Lee Fiveash
   

 

Last Updated: