Simon (Michael Emil) and Sidney (Zack Norman) are planning a heist of New York Mafia money, and Simon is obsessing over the details while Sidney reassures him that everything will go to plan. Simon is an accountant for Mob money, and on one day this week he will tell his contacts not to come in so that he can abscond with thousands of dollars. All goes well, or appears to, and the duo take a limousine to drive down to Florida; Simon is exasperated when Sidney tells him that the plane they want to take them to Costa Rica and a new life will arrive after the weekend rather than before, but that turns out to be the least of their problems...
Written by the director Henry Jaglom (who also appears in a supporting role), Sitting Ducks features so many neurotic characters that it begged to be compared with Woody Allen's work. Imagine four Woodys, two of them young females and the other two middle aged men, all conversing in the back of the limo and you'll get some idea of what to expect. However, such comparisons are not entirely accurate, as this comedy comes across as semi-improvised, with long, amusing conversations about nothing in particular as the characters try to make up for their own shortcomings, and no one-liners to be heard.
Simon and Sidney talk incessantly and are never lacking a topic to argue about, especially when Simon believes, with good reason, that Sidney is being needlessly indiscreet about the crime they have committed. Jaglom saw the two men as a Stan Laurel and Oliver Hardy for the late seventies/early eighties, and while they don't hit those heights of comedy, you can see where he's coming from in their banter and the way they get themselves into awkward situations, apparently oblivious to how ridiculous they look. They're too busy with their chatter, their boasting, and of course, their endless quest to get laid as often as possible.
First stop is to fill up the gas tank, and there they meet Moose (Richard Romanus), an aspiring singer-songwriter who eagerly agrees to be their chauffeur for a handsome fee. When they stop off at a hotel, Simon doesn't want to leave their room at first, so paranoid is he, but eventually Sidney wins him round and they head off for the poolside. There they meet Jenny (Patrice Townsend) and her boyfriend, and she tries to teach Simon yoga moves as Sidney looks on jealously. That night, Jenny's boyfriend walks out on her, and she agrees to go with the three men, and not only that but waitress Leona (Irene Forrest) walks out on her job to join the party as well.
And so it is that we are treated to a selection of their conversations as Sidney and Simon trying to get the two ladies into bed (whenever Moose tries to join in with the talk Sidney puts up the dividing window so they can't hear him). It is here that you will either be driven up the wall by Simon's claims of being the world's greatest lover, unlikely as it sounds, or be laughing out loud at the now renowned masturbation discussion. As it transpires, Sidney suffers premature ejaculation, and so Simon is the one who sleeps with both women in one night! After this frivolity, the seriousness of the thriller plotline doesn't really convince, and the twist is hard to accept with these people at the centre of it, but there's a nice final joke and if you are entertained by these characters in the first five minutes, you shouldn't be disappointed. If not, forget it. Music by Romanus.
