HOME |  CULT MOVIES | COMPETITIONS | ADVERTISE |  CONTACT US |  ABOUT US
 
 
Newest Reviews
Mowgli
Ski School
Ant-Man and the Wasp
Age of Shadows, The
Mission: Impossible - Fallout
Othello
First Reformed
Red White and Zero
Death Wish
Cry Wilderness
Heiresses, The
Millhouse: A White Comedy
Skyscraper
Born of Fire
Teen Titans Go! To the Movies
Lucia
Yanks
Sweet November
Ballad of Buster Scruggs, The
Real Men
Shoplifters
Redeemer
Incredibles 2
Big House, The
Night Eats the World, The
War Bus
Back to Berlin
Leave No Trace
They Shall Not Grow Old
Dollman
   
 
Newest Articles
A Name to Conjure With: David Nixon's Magic Box on DVD
Which 1950s Sci-Fi was Scariest? Invaders from Mars vs The Blob
The Empire Strikes Back: Khartoum vs Carry On Up the Khyber
Stan and Ollie's Final Folly: Atoll K on Blu-ray
The Big Grapple: Escape from New York and Its Influence
The Conquest of Everett: The Kenny Everett Video Show on DVD
Bout for the Count: Hammer's Dracula in the 1970s
Nopes from a Small Island: Mistreatment of American Stars in British Films
You Know, For Kids: Children's Film Foundation Bumper Box
If He Were a Carpenter and It Was the 80s: The Fog, Prince of Darkness and They Live
Tee-Hee, It's 80s Sci-Fi Horror: Night of the Comet, The Stuff and Night of the Creeps
Chance of a Ghost: The Uninvited and The Ghost and Mrs. Muir
3 Simian Slashers: Phenomena, Link and Monkey Shines
When is a Jackie Chan Movie Not a Jackie Chan Movie? Armour of God and City Hunter
Anytime Anywhere: The Complete Goodies at the BBC Episode Guide Part 2
   
 
  5ive Girls Young, gifted and doomedBuy this film here.
Year: 2006
Director: Warren P. Sonoda
Stars: Ron Perlman, Jennifer Miller, Jordan Madley, Terra Vnesa, Barbara Mamabolo, Tasha May, Amy Lalonde, Krysta Carter, James Kidnie, Richard Alan Campbell
Genre: Horror
Rating:  4 (from 1 vote)
Review: Alex (Jennifer Miller), a troubled teenager with psychokinetic powers, is sent to Catholic reform school for wayward girls run by caring but conflicted priest Father Drake (Ron Perlman) and sadistic headmistress Miss Pearce (Amy Lalonde). After some initial friction, Alex befriends her fellow inmates: token badass Maya (Jordan Madley), perky blind girl Cecilia (Terra Vnesa), rich chick Leah (Barbara Mamabolo) and self-harming wiccan Connie (Tasha May), each of whom wield their own, unique supernatural talents. Soon afterwards the girls find themselves haunted by the spectral manifestation of Elizabeth (Krysta Carter), a pious pupil from several years ago who was supposedly abducted by the ancient demon, Legion. It becomes apparent someone at the school intends to offer these five girls as a sacrifice, redeeming Elizabeth’s soul and releasing Legion into the mortal world.

Lazy slasher clichés and repetitive zombie flicks are annoying enough, but what really frustrates a horror fan is when a film has a compelling premise and intriguing characters yet still somehow drops the ball. Despite an irksome, would-be trendy alpha-numerical hybrid title, 5ive Girls has a lot going for it: a smart set-up, snappy characterisation, oddball humour (e.g. a dialogue scene with the girls conversing behind toilet stalls whilst collecting urine samples!) and an attractive cast who deliver engaging performances. But under the leaden direction of Warren P. Sonoda the plot plods listlessly along whilst the muddled theology underlining his script leaves this an exasperating, hollow, spiritually deflating experience. The key line here is: “Be careful with hope. It’s a trick the devil will play on you.” It is essentially a film about the futility of hope and faith, be it religious or secular humanist.

Given how so many teen witch movies, even otherwise cautionary fables, are concerned with female empowerment, one might expect the plot would have our five heroines combine their powers to fight the demon. In fact, their powers prove ineffectual to the point of seeming wholly superfluous. These girls are plain doomed, the devil is all powerful and seemingly takes special relish in bashing sweet, gutsy blind girl Cecilia into a bloody mess. None of this would seem quite so galling were not our five heroines drawn as such feisty, spirited personalities. Why give them these skills only to underline how useless they are? The film’s defeatist metaphysical outlook is equally confused. If goodness is so weak and the evil entity so all-powerful why is it trapped in another dimension and in need of five souls to break free? If it already rules the mortal world, then why bother to invade it? Answers on a postcard marked 666, if you please.

As with other teen witch-cum-demonic possession flicks, 5ive Girls hits the usual buttons of heavy metal posturing, glossy misogyny and Catholic schoolgirl fantasies with the girls stripped to their underwear for humiliating inspections and Alex having her bottom spanked with a ruler by the tyrannical Miss Pearce, alongside more good-natured lesbian undertones. Legion itself is a particularly silly example of devilry, driving the girls to pig out on junk food or speak in a dopey electronic voice. Ron Perlman is wasted in what nowadays ranks as the typical ineffectual savant role, but still grounds his rather vague character. Kristen Bell lookalike Jennifer Miller makes an impression as the tragic but wryly humorous heroine, but the would-be shock climax makes a mockery of her character arc and ends things on an nonsensical, indifferent shrug.

Reviewer: Andrew Pragasam

 

This review has been viewed 3367 time(s).

As a member you could Rate this film

 
Review Comments (2)


Untitled 1

Login
  Username:
 
  Password:
 
   
 
Forgotten your details? Enter email address in Username box and click Reminder. Your details will be emailed to you.
   

Latest Poll
Which star do you think makes the best coffee?
Emma Stone
Anna Kendrick
Michelle Rodriguez
Sir Patrick Stewart
   
 
   

Recent Visitors
Graeme Clark
George White
Paul Smith
Andrew Pragasam
Darren Jones
Aseels Almasi
Rashed Ali
Alexander Taylor
   

 

Last Updated: