HOME |  CULT MOVIES | COMPETITIONS | ADVERTISE |  CONTACT US |  ABOUT US
 
 
Newest Reviews
Steel and Lace
Reivers, The
Angel Has Fallen
I Lost My Body
At First Light
Free Ride
Crawl
Transit
Blank Check
Mad Monk, The
Wind, The
Holly and the Ivy, The
Atlantique
Now, Voyager
Wolf's Call, The
Nostalghia
Nightingale, The
Eighth Grade
Irishman, The
Betrayed
Lords of Chaos
Operation Petticoat
Dead Don't Die, The
On the Waterfront
Last Faust, The
Moonlighting
Art of Self-Defense, The
Ironweed
Booksmart
Prisoners
Beach Bum, The
Kill Ben Lyk
Into the Mirror
Support the Girls
Werewolf
Little Monsters
Spider-Man: Far from Home
Horrible Histories: The Movie - Rotten Romans
Pentathlon
Anna
   
 
Newest Articles
Memories Are Made of This: La Jetee and Sans Soleil on Blu-ray
Step Back in Time: The Amazing Mr. Blunden on Blu-ray
Crazy Cats and Kittens: What's New Pussycat on Blu-ray
No Place Like Home Guard: Dad's Army - The Lost Episodes on Blu-ray
A Real-Life Pixie: A Tribute to Michael J. Pollard in Four Roles
We're All In This Together: The Halfway House on Blu-ray
Please Yourselves: Frankie Howerd and The House in Nightmare Park on Blu-ray
Cleesed Off: Clockwise on Blu-ray
Sorry I Missed You: Les Demoiselles de Rochefort on Blu-ray
Silliest of the Silly: Monty Python's Flying Circus Series 1 on Blu-ray
Protest Songs: Hair on Blu-ray
Peak 80s Schwarzenegger: The Running Man and Red Heat
Rock On: That'll Be the Day and Stardust on Blu-ray
Growing Up in Public: 7-63 Up on Blu-ray
Learn Your Craft: Legend of the Witches and Secret Rites on Blu-ray
70s Psycho-Thrillers! And Soon the Darkness and Fright on Blu-ray
Split: Stephen King and George A. Romero's The Dark Half on Blu-ray
Disney Post-Walt: Three Gamechangers
But Doctor, I Am Pagliacci: Tony Hancock's The Rebel and The Punch and Judy Man on Blu-ray
Once Upon a Time in Deadwood: Interview with Director Rene Perez
Shit-Eating Grim: Salo, or the 120 Days of Sodom on Blu-ray
Stallone's 80s Action Alpha and Omega: Nighthawks and Lock Up
Python Prehistory: At Last the 1948 Show and Do Not Adjust Your Set on DVD
You Could Grow to Love This Place: Local Hero on Blu-ray
Anglo-American: Joseph Losey Blu-ray Double Bill - The Criminal and The Go-Between
   
 
  Chemical Wedding do what thou wiltBuy this film here.
Year: 2008
Director: Julian Doyle
Stars: Simon Callow, Kal Weber, Lucy Cudden, Jud Charlton, Paul McDowell, John Shrapnel, Richard Franklin, Terence Bayler, Robert Ashby, Jared Ashe, Antonia Beamish, Esmé Bianco, Geoff Breton, Lily Dumont, Mat Fraser, Helen Millar, Lizzie Millne, Perrine Moran
Genre: Horror, Science Fiction, Weirdo
Rating:  3 (from 1 vote)
Review: Aleister Crowley, occultist, philosopher and self-styled “wickedest man in the world” is the subject of this peculiar horror movie, scripted by former Iron Maiden front-man Bruce Dickinson. American scientist Professor Mathers (Kal Weber) arrives at Cambridge University where he attracts pretty student reporter Leah Robinson (Lucy Cudden), eager to get the scoop on his top secret experiment. For reasons never entirely made clear, Mathers plans to link his state-of-the-art virtual reality suit to the world’s biggest super computer.

Unknown to him, his occult obsessed co-programmer Victor Neumann (Jud Charlton) has uploaded all of the late Crowley’s black magic ceremonies into the computer in binary form, so when his stuttering accomplice Professor Haddo (Simon Callow) enters the suit, he emerges transformed into “the Beast” himself. Crowley/Haddo proceeds to run rampant with sex, murder and depravity, culminating in an occult ritual known as the Chemical Wedding, while Mathers, Leah and Professor Symons (Paul McDowell) try to send him back to hell.

The mix of occult lore and science fiction (as Victor remarks: “Quantum physics is the new alchemy”) evokes Nigel Kneale, but this is a deeply silly movie. As directed by onetime Monty Python collaborator Julian Doyle, it remains hard to discern whether this is meant to be high camp or faithfully following Crowley’s oft-quoted dictum: “Do what thou wilt.” While fantasy writers from Neil Gaiman to Alan Moore take Crowley pretty seriously, the man’s church-baiting hedonism more closely resembles modern, self-aggrandising celebrity than anything particularly satanic. Those who celebrate him as a libertarian would do well to remember he was also a racist whose bisexuality stemmed from his deep-rooted contempt for women - qualities that would make him a far scarier villain than he is here.

Bruce Dickinson seems an intelligent, well read man. His script is occasionally erudite yet dense with Crowley lore, freemasonry and quantum physics to the point of incoherence. The unfolding events are very much a rock star’s idea of satanic evil: rampant orgies, drug use and rude behaviour. Simon Callow camps it up as Haddo/Crowley deposits a steaming pile of excrement upon his desk, hypnotises a girl into stripping off, crucifies a call girl after shaving her pubic hair, and goads Victor into a threesome with a busty, “Whore of Babylon.” Most of the sex and violence occurs off-screen, which is just as well given a faintly offensive moment that implies Crowley has sodomised a crippled woman to “cure” her. However, Doyle’s haphazard storytelling coupled with Callow’s over the top bellowing renders several supporting characters impossibly vague. Why on earth do people flock to such a ridiculous character?

A trippy, Satanism meets cyberpunk finale works in Schrödinger’s cat, chaos theory and a neat twist about parallel worlds (implying ours is the one governed by Satan), but the clever concepts are swamped in a mire of inanity. With antics that range from a ridiculous pagan analysis of Hamlet (“Academics are mere boils on the Bard’s arsehole”) before dropping his pants to piss all over the students, and masturbating over a mystic parchment that he then faxes to Leah (semen and all!), this horror villain is little more than a pantomime joke. Maybe that’s the point, since the real Crowley looks more like one with each passing decade.
Reviewer: Andrew Pragasam

 

This review has been viewed 2692 time(s).

As a member you could Rate this film

 
Review Comments (0)


Untitled 1

Login
  Username:
 
  Password:
 
   
 
Forgotten your details? Enter email address in Username box and click Reminder. Your details will be emailed to you.
   

Latest Poll
Which star do you think makes the best coffee?
Emma Stone
Anna Kendrick
Michelle Rodriguez
Sir Patrick Stewart
   
 
   

Recent Visitors
Graeme Clark
Andrew Pragasam
Enoch Sneed
Darren Jones
Paul Smith
  Rachel Franke
Paul Shrimpton
  Desbris M
   

 

Last Updated: